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How to stop fighting with your partner; 6 effective tips
Fighting over petty issues with your partner but can’t get to the root cause? Here are ways to communicate effectively, stop fighting and build a healthy bond.
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Occasional fights, at times on silly issues, are not uncommon in relationships or marriages. This is mostly followed by peace and life resumes as usual.
There are however times when fights are intense and issues are serious. This leads to blame game and relations turn sour.
In many cases, trigger of an ugly argument may not be the main reason but deeper issues such as lack of trust, suppressed feelings or disagreement over timing of parenthood could be the behind it.
In such cases a constructive dialogue while understanding each other’s feelings could go a long way in settling such fights once and for all.
Being mindful and respectful during an argument can go a long way in protecting your relationship from the after-effects of a fight. (Also read: Top challenges in a relationship and how to keep the love alive)
Fighting with your partner can be a frustrating and exhausting experience, and it can take a toll on your relationship. (Pexels)
Fighting with your partner can be a frustrating and exhausting experience, and it can take a toll on your relationship. (Pexels)
“Fighting with your partner can be a frustrating and exhausting experience, and it can take a toll on your relationship. Fortunately, there are many effective ways to stop fighting and maintain a healthy and loving relationship,” says Arouba Kabir, Mental Health Counsellor & Founder, Enso Wellness.
HOW TO STOP FIGHTING
Here are six tips suggested by Arouba that can help:
- Practice active listening: When it comes to communication, listening is key. Active listening means paying attention to your partner’s words and understanding their perspective. It is crucial to give your partner your full attention and avoid interrupting them. What can you say? “I hear what you’re saying, and I understand how you feel.”
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Be mindful of your tone and language: The way you speak to your partner can have a significant impact on the outcome of a conversation. It is essential to speak respectfully and avoid using language that could come off as aggressive or confrontational.
Instead of placing blame, use “I” statements to express your thoughts and feelings. You can say, “I feel hurt when you speak to me like that, can we try to communicate more respectfully?”
- Take a break: In the heat of the moment, emotions can run high, and it can be difficult to have a productive conversation. When things start to escalate, take a break and step away from the situation. Use this time to calm down and collect your thoughts. “I think we should take a break and revisit this conversation when we’re both in a better headspace”, can be said.
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Find a compromise: Compromise is a critical component of any healthy relationship. Know and accept that we all come from different upbringing, background etc even if same culture and religion- so we might want the same thing, but the actions would be different. So be kind
Instead of trying to “win” an argument, focus on finding a solution that works for both of you. This may require some give-and-take, but it will lead to a more peaceful and fulfilling relationship. You may say, “I understand your perspective, can we work together to find a solution that works for both of us?”
- Practice empathy: Empathy means understanding and sharing your partner’s feelings. When you practice empathy, you’re more likely to approach your partner’s concerns with understanding and compassion.
This, in turn, can help diffuse potential arguments before they even begin. You can say something like, “I can understand why you feel that way, and I’m here to support you.”
- Seek professional help: If you’re struggling to stop fighting with your partner, it may be time to seek professional help.
A trained therapist can provide you with the tools and resources you need to communicate more effectively and work through your issues.
You can share your perspective by saying, “I think it would be helpful for us to see a therapist together to work on our communication and relationship.”
“In conclusion, stopping fights with your partner is crucial to maintain a healthy and happy relationship.
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By practicing active listening, being mindful of your tone and language, taking a break, finding a compromise, practicing empathy, and seeking professional help, you can work together with your partner to build a strong and fulfilling relationship,” says Arouba.
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