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How To Forget Someone You Love
Breaking ties with someone is never easy, especially if you still love them.
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However, with time, patience, and a few healthy coping strategies, you can move on and find happiness again.
Start by removing the person from your life, both by eliminating contact and taking down reminders.
Then you can work on letting go of the hurt and moving on:
1.Break off contact completely. It’s hard to get over someone or forget them if you’re still talking to them or even if you’re still just friends on social media.
Unfriend the person on all your social media accounts.
Let the person know you need a long break from them, even if you want to be friends in the future.
- Give up the possibility that you could get the person back. Don’t dwell on the thought that you might get back together.
That only makes you hope and fantasize about the person. Instead, focus on letting go of the relationship, reminding yourself that it’s over when you need to.
- Write a letter to the person that you don’t send. Get all your feelings out on paper.
Tell your ex how they hurt you. Write down the good memories and the bad, and just use the time to get out some of your emotions. The letter is for you; there’s no need to send it.
- Delete the person’s emails, texts, and voicemails. When you have text or messages from your ex, you’re likely to go back and read them, dwelling in the past.
Go through all of your accounts, and delete all messages, so you won’t be tempted.
If you’re afraid you might want the memories later, try saving them on an external hard drive and give it to a friend. Then you can’t take it out at will to remember.
- Take down or delete all the photos you have of the person. Remove the photos from the walls and your picture albums.
Delete any photos you have on your phone or computer, as well as any on your social media accounts. You don’t need those reminders around.
Once again, if you can’t quite let go, put them on an external hard drive along with any hard copies you have and ask a friend to hold them for a while.
- Have a ceremonial burning of any reminders you have around.
Sometimes, you just need to cleanse your mind of the other person.
One way to do that is to gather up items you have around that remind you of them. Put them in a metal trash can, and set them on fire. You can do this with old letters, photos, or clothing, for instance.
- Remind yourself why it didn’t work out. If you’re having a hard time getting over someone, it’s likely because you’re remembering all the good times without the bad.
Take time to remember why you broke up, so you can break through the fantasy.Try writing about it. Journal about the painful memories you have with the intention of letting go of that hurt, too, so you can move on.
Your relationship ended because something happened or it wasn’t going well, and if you put that relationship on a pedestal of perfection, it’s hard to get over it.
- Forgive the person to let go of your anger. One way to work on forgiving them is to remember the good parts of the person, too.
Think about what made you like them in the first place, so you can think of them as a whole person who makes mistakes.
It’s only when you think of them as a fallible human being with both good and bad qualities that you can forgive them their mistakes.
Another way to work on forgiveness is to think about how you feel about what the person did to you.
Think about how those emotions are affecting your life. For instance, if you feel angry and bitter, how is that coloring how you see the world
- Teach yourself to be independent again. During this time, remember that you are a whole person on your own. You don’t need someone else to make you complete, so take this time to discover yourself again without the other person.
Make a list of all the things you can do now that you’re not in a relationship.
For instance, maybe you can spend more time with your friends and family, go on solo trips, move out of town, or stay up as late as you want. This list can you remind you of how fun it can be to be independent.
- Remind yourself of your strength. When you break up with someone, you may be feeling vulnerable and like you don’t have the power to get over the pain.
But you are strong enough, you just need to give yourself some reminders.
Take time to write down a few of your strengths and past triumphs to show yourself that you can and will get through this time.
